I was born in a wartime... when the flames burnt my hope for
a life... I remember the first moments of my life when I was in the smokes of a
burnt lantern and in a lonely dark room because my parents where welcoming my
grandmother whom I expected to meet for the first time... when they came to my
room... they saw but a black cloud urging them to enter to rescue their
son..
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| Dad carried me out of flames... |
I remember when times I had to
look up the sky from my locked room for the fear of a fight that might occur
because of my child- playing times…
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| I couldn't but see through a window what is the outer world but I had the widest imagination ever to go round the globe! |
I meditated instead of playing unlike what
all children do... I played my mind instead of playing my body... I remember
those lovely days no matter who harsh I cried for freedom... I wrote some
suicidal letters... I did crazy things but to escape my prison...
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| Myself when I was 2 years old |
It was all good till my ninth year of life when I shocked
that it was impossible for me to enjoy candies! I am diabetic! Oh! No! Please!
… Yes! You are! I felt helpless and I felt gifted in the same time… gifted that
I am that strong guy that can carry the duties of a disease especially when I'm
so young…
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| I didn't fear injections... instead I felt special taking them several times a day |
Strikingly after 4 years... I am epileptic! I went through
the most intense days of fear and hopelessness! I thought about ending my life
several times… Till one day I though from another perspective… what if I really
die?! Does that matter? Would anyone care?!
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| I always feel like I am dying and by multiple seizures I won't fear death any more :) |
Will my death be special?! Will anyone know of my sufferings
or it’s just a candle that would put off during a gloomy winter night! Well...
OK! What if I had no disease and suddenly passed
away in a car bomb?!
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| Many of the people I know had graveyards like this |
I concluded that I will live as if I was any of those
healthy youngsters who went for nothing but stupidity… I did most of my life
through my subconscious mind… I never lived a life only months ago when I
suddenly turned into the most positive person ever! I went through the last of
my gloomy debates and decided that I will live my life and it would be an
amazing life... After years of experiences and life changes ranging from hating
my life or loving anyone for the fact that I would pass away and I was only
meant to do welfare and share kindness so that people may ask god to have mercy
upon me!
 |
| I smile and I will smile forever because I am positive and I will be positive forever! |
I knew if god should
have a mercy upon me only if I had that mercy upon myself! I changed several
times but to know what is life and I am still changing and I will forever
change... I am learning... I learnt and I will learn… I will be part of life
and life would be part of me… I took the best from every experience I had and I
will always take but the best... I know that best shouldn't always come first
but the best will always be the best… for the souls of all of my relatives,
friends, neighbours and lecturers I've lost... We will meet thereafter and you
will be proud knowing me... I love life... because you are my life! <3
